Ahem

I told myself that today I would do all my mindless internetting and the ritual eating of the breakfast before starting work so I can maximize not only my efficiency but also cut out all the fun stuff in one fell swoop so I don't use it as an excuse to take take a 10 minute internet break after making one phone call.

Do I get a prize or something prize-like for my award winning run-on sentence?

I've found a flaw in the plan. I don't know if you all realize this or not, but the internets, they are infinite. And my blog is part of the infiniteness. And blogging takes more time than just about anything else I do on the internet. Ergo, I'm sacrificing time management on the alter of efficiency. Should I have brought a burnt offering for that? Where are my manners...

I was deathly ill (read: scratchy throat) this past weekend, and by Saturday night I had lost my voice completely. However, just prior to Saturday night I sounded exactly like a pubescent bullfrog. Most warm blooded humans with any ounce of soul tethered even perilously to the last vestige of flesh and bone would be able to garner some kind of sympathy for the infirm. The cashier at CVS on Saturday night was no such mortal being.

Non-Human CVS Cashier: Hello!

The Otherwise Sympathy Inducing Human Customer: hII. (Ahem, cough, clear throat)

NHCVSC: Is this all for you? (motioning to my extra strength throat spray stuff)

TOSIHC: yES, (hack, clear throat) THank ooO.

NHCVSC: So, are you sick or what? What do you need this for?

TOSIHC: Na sURE wh--- (ahem) what is WRONG. My vo--- (ahem) vo--- (cough, ahem) vOICE keeps go---ing iiNN and out.

NHCVSC: I'm sorry, what did you say?

TOSIHC: (Ahem, cough, clears throat) I s--d I th--k I'm OOsing my VOice.

NHCVSC: Come again?

TOSIHC: My thROAT huRRts and I'm l--sing my --ice.

NHCVSC: Ha ha. I heard what you said the first time. Ha ha ha.

TOSIHC: J--k (hemm, cough) JERK.

In totally unrelated news, throat spray makes me gag.